All I Wanna Do Is Love You

If I could have the chance to make things that went wrong right I would give my last breath. I am a healer. I am a good woman who is trying to make good choices. I fall, I falter, I make mistakes. I am an imperfect human being in a perfect world. I want to have my life back! I want to feel again! I want to believe that everything I've wanted is something I deserve. I want to be fun, and laugh. I want to remember what it was like to be stressed, not be in a position where I'm not eating because of the stress. I can not keep this up. I must get my life back. I just can't seem to find it in this mess I've made. I want to be free to do what I know I love. I want to be free to love who I love. I suppose that this Abrihamic test everyone keeps telling me I have to pass is learning to give up the desire to have the control. I've never been good at allowing someone else to have control over what I was, or how I lived. Now, I don't have a choice. I want to love you. I want more for you to love me back. Just make the choice and love me back!